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What is your ideal summer vacation?
Hot springs! I’m obsessed with hot springs and soaking in them. I want to go to any and all of them, but I especially want to go to Chena Hot Springs in Alaska, or Grand Resort Bad Ragaz in Switzerland. Summer would be a great time to visit those places, because I’m a giant baby about the cold, but I do love some beautiful scenery. I would go alone, because traveling alone is the only way I like to travel. I would soak in the healing waters, all by myself, eating when I’m hungry, sleeping when I’m tired, and compromising on nothing. I would wear lots of floaty kaftans and muumuus and big floppy hats.
What superpower would you like to have?
Healing powers! I think it would be super cool to be able to heal people of their ailments, both mental and physical. The only problem would be, once people found out about my ability, they might try to kidnap me, or use my powers for nefarious purposes. I would have to keep my ability secret, and only use it on occasion. But that would bring a lot of guilt with it, because how would I decide who to heal and who not to heal?
Ok, so maybe I don’t actually want healing powers. How about flying? Flying would be cool.
What reality show would you like to be on?
I don’t know if it counts as a reality show, but I’d love to be on Wheel of Fortune. I’m pretty good at it, when I’m shouting at the TV from my couch, and I would very much like to win money for being good at word puzzles. I love word puzzles.
Who are four literary characters you’d like to have over for dinner?
First would be Arturo Binewski, from Geek Love, no question. The bald, flippered, cult leader is the best written character I have ever encountered, and it makes me sad all day that I’ll probably never write a character as compelling. But having dinner with him would be a good start.
The second guest I would invite is Hannibal Lecter. So insightful, and full of knowledge! So cultured! He could tell me all about Dante and stuff. He would not be in charge of menu planning.
Next would be Lisbeth Salander, from the Girl With a Dragon Tattoo series. She’s the ultimate hero, and I wouldn’t be at all bothered by her taciturnity or her lack of humor, because I know she’s a total badass, and I would be pleased just to get to know her. Maybe she could fix my ipad, which has issues.
Finally, I would invite Shit Turd, the world’s most charming crow. I’m aware that it’s probably odd to invite a crow to dinner, but if you’ve read Hollow Kingdom, you understand that this is a special crow, a marvelous crow, and one that you definitely want to have in your home. I would feed him a gigantic bag of Cheetos.
You are given a million dollars, but can’t save any of it. What would you spend it on?
I would set aside two hundred fifty thousand dollars for taxes. I would pay to upgrade my house, including fresh paint, new furniture, and repairing the stone wall in the backyard that is soon going to ruin everyone’s lives if we don’t fix it. Then I would buy a new car. Then I would buy myself a vacation to Grand Resort Bad Ragaz in Switzerland. I would donate the rest to the ACLU. They need it right now.
It’s the end of the school year. For most kids, it’s time to relax and get ready for summer. For Fanny, there’s work. She has a brand-new baby brother, and she’s been hired by Zeus to look after his “injured” son. And she still has her and her friends’ cheesemaking business! Fanny is overwhelmed.
But then she meets three sirens who want Fanny to join them on Feather Island for a summer of singing, instrument playing, and fun at the beach. The program is totally free and could start an amazing musical career-the thing that Fanny has always wanted the most.
Athena and Gemma are dead set against it. Athena says that the sirens are bad news; that their whole purpose in life is to lure men to their deaths with their beautiful singing. Gemma says that Feather Island is part of a network of unmappable islands, the type of place where criminals and sketchy organizations hoard their wealth and do their crimes.
Surely, the sirens don’t do that anymore, right? All that stuff was a long time ago. If the sirens want to keep their island paradise a secret, well, that’s not so weird, is it? Fanny has talked to them, and she just knows that they aren’t as evil as everyone says. They are perfectly nice ladies.
Right?
Follow Fanny Fitzpatrick as she navigates big sisterhood, friends who disapprove of her life choices, burning ambitions, and a bunch of sirens luring her away to their private island.
Read an Excerpt
But I don’t have a chance to practice or not practice, because I remember that I have a Zoom date with Gemma and Athena. I head down to the computer and log in to the meeting.
Gemma and Athena are already in there, talking about something. They look serious and sour, but Gemma is wearing the most adorable newsboy hat with embroidered flowers on it, and I squeal when I see it.
“Gemma, that hat though!”
They stop talking and look at me, not smiling. I realize something weird is going on, and so I stop smiling.
“Fanny, we need to talk,” says Athena.
That’s not good.
“Um. Gemma? How’s England?” Gemma shakes her head at me.
I look back to Athena, who has crossed her arms, which makes her look like a strict disciplinarian who’s about to give me a terrible lecture. And I realize that’s exactly what’s about to happen.
“Herman told me everything,” Athena says.
“Um.”
“You let those things in your house! After I specifically told you how dangerous they are!”
“I didn’t let them in,” I say, which I realize is a wimpy thing to say, but I can’t think of anything better. “My dad did.”
“What did they want? Why were they there, at your house?”
“Well—”
“Do you have any idea how many people sirens have killed over the course of these millennia?”
“But that was a long time ago!” I say, sounding desperate and silly, even to my own ears.
“Fanny,” Gemma says, quietly, looking around to make sure no one is listening to her. “I’m not supposed to say this. But there are these islands. A few of them. And they have special deals with the UN, NATO, the African Union, and a few others that I’m not allowed to even say the names of. They have diplomatic immunity. They operate under their own laws, and they answer to no one. They’re unmappable, untraceable. I’ve been talking to Athena, and I think these islands are owned by the sirens.”
“You sound like conspiracy theorists,” I say, rolling my eyes. “How do you even know about these top-secret islands if they’re so top secret?”
“My parents,” Gemma says, like it’s obvious. I guess it should be obvious. I still have no idea what her parents do for a living, but they seem to jet around the planet a lot, with machete-bearing security guards, so I guess it must be important. Still.
“Well, Feather Island is a school. A school for musicians,” I say, trying to reassure them. “There’s a brochure and everything.”
I wish I had the brochure so I could show it to them, how lovely and harmless the place is, but my parents have put it somewhere and I don’t know where it is.
“How do you know about Feather Island?” Athena demands, looking even more furious.
Whoops. I guess I’ve gotta tell them now.
“That’s what the sirens wanted. To tell me about their music camp.”
“NO!” Athena shouts, banging her fist on the table in front of her. Splinters of wood fly everywhere and I’m kind of scared now. This is intense, even for Athena. “You can NOT go to this island. I don’t care what they told you. It’s bad news.”
About the Author: Dana Hammer is a novelist, screenwriter and playwright. She has won over forty awards and honors for her writing, few of which generated income, all of which were deeply appreciated. She is not a cannibal, but she is the author of A Cannibals Guide to Fasting. Dana is also the author of middle grade fantasy My Best Friend Athena which was inspired by a desire to write something her 9 year old daughter could read.
Website:
https://www.danahammer.com/
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/danahammerwriterofthings
Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/Fanny-Fitzpatrick-Sirens-Dana-Hammer/dp/1962308243/ref=sr_1_1
